bloggers block

Oh, I just got a bad case of it. I had all these great ideas earlier. And now I can't even think where I was going with most of them. Some days are better for writing than others. Same way with scrapbooking. I can either lay-out the page or I can write about the experience, but I can't usually do both in the same session. I have got to get this e fixed or I will go crazy. This keyboard is new. Why doesn't the e work better? Cat vomit? oNe never knows.

Erma Bombeck "If I had my life to live over" style of parenting

I have been parenting my four and three-quarters year old daughter with what is best described as a mis-interpretation of Erma Bombeck's "If I had my life to live over" essay with some disastrous results. If you are not familiar with the essay, here it is:

I would have talked less and listened more. I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded. I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace. I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth. I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed. I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage. I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains. I would have cried and laughed less while watching television -- and more while watching life. I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband. I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day. I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime. Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle. When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner." There would have been more "I love yous", more "I'm sorrys" ... but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it ... live it...and never give it back.

These are good thoughts to live by, and this from a famously insightful mother. However, somehow I got it screwed up in my head that this also meant:
I would have played Candyland more and cleaned the house less.
I don't know if I got that from another 'rules to live by' email from some well-meaning friend, or if I just added on this little tidbit my own stupid self. But that little screw-up has not worked out so well. For one, my dear daughter is fairly spoiled by my near-constant attention. This was really bad when she was three and early four. It has been hard to wean her of that attention, but with dedication (okay, more like I finally went brain-dead and began to tune her out), I have been able to focus on other things in my life. For another, my house had become a filth-pit of old food, cobwebs, and scads of toys. To that end (and to save my sanity), I began to focus my attention on some needed chores and away from said daughter. It wasn't well received at first. But I did get some sanity back in my life. I do NOT regret taking some time away from my daughter to clean my disgusting house. My girl has finally learned to entertain herself for short periods of time. She is seeing a good example in her mother that there are chores in life, and they must be done, and life is not all about play. And I find my domicile more livable. I developed a chore list that I actually refer to during the day, and it works for me. Now laundry doesn't pile up to the five-load level. The leftover food makes it into either the fridge or the trash. The dishes get done. And yes, I still have time for that game of Candyland!

New blogger alert

So inspired by Catboogler that I had to have a blog of my own, I have launched beckysuebutthead and hope to post bi-daily or whatever. My e doesn't work on my keyboard and it is pissing me off, so if you see any glaring mispellings, just add an e somewhre.
I had been blogging on the nutrisystem site, but that was mostly bitching about how hungry I was and how some food was okay, but other food sucked. Now I get to bitch about everything! Yay!
As for nutrisystem, I am only on it about every third day, and it somehow just doesn't work as well that way. Particularly if you blow it in spectacular fashion two days out of three. However, I am getting my exercise in because. . . Brianna can ride a bike around the block. Yes, her first bike, training wheels and all. And I jog/walk with her. I am so proud of her I could bust. Now, I hope to keep her interested and also to encourage her to go faster. She is a remarkably cautious child, and has a typical short-term interest in things. But I hope as she gets better at pedalling, to go riding with her, and for that I am very excited. Also Brianna likes to crawl on me when I do pushups, squats and situps. So the extra 34 pounds she adds definitely challenges my calisthenics.
So here it is, first post, add it to your favorites list. Tell your friends.